Hesitating About Cohousing?
Why people hesitate about cohousing…
And what’s helped our members
Deciding whether cohousing is right for you isn’t something to rush — and that’s a good thing. At Esquimalt Village Cohousing, we hear from many people who are curious, interested, and asking thoughtful questions before taking the next step.
Over time, a handful of common hesitations come up again and again. Below, we’re sharing five of the most frequent ones — along with what helped our members move forward when they were in the same place.
If you’re just beginning to explore cohousing, this post is for you.
1 - Worried you won’t fit in:
Many people imagine cohousing as being “for” a certain type of person or life stage. In reality, our community includes a mix of ages, households, and paths into cohousing. Associate membership is a low-pressure way to get to know our group, the culture, and whether this feels like the right community for you — before making any bigger commitment.
2 - Not knowing what cohousing really involves:
Until you’ve seen it up close, cohousing can feel abstract. Our free webinars and in-person events are designed to make it concrete — from how communities form and make decisions to what daily life actually feels like. Many of our current members started out simply curious, and learning more was the step that helped them move forward with confidence.
3 - Cost and affordability:
Cohousing is a financial commitment - something you’re wise to think carefully about in today’s economy. For many of our members, the appeal is the rare opportunity to help design a home — and a community — that’s truly made for you. At Esquimalt, we’re also exploring shared units for people who want to live as roommates, which can make cohousing more accessible. It’s uncommon to design your own living space, and even more uncommon to do it collaboratively with the person you’ll share it with.
4 - What do I know about buying land, or building permits?
Securing land and navigating building permits can feel daunting. One advantage of joining our community is that this work is already underway: our members have secured the land, and we’re now in the design and build stage. We’re still welcoming new Associate and Equity members, which means you can join our cohousing and have your say without having to navigate phases like land acquisition and permitting.
5 - Worried about group dynamics or decision-making
Living in community can raise fair questions: Will meetings take over my life? What happens when people disagree? Our members aren’t looking for endless consensus or forced togetherness. We use clear structures, facilitation, and shared agreements to make decision-making manageable — and many people find that learning these skills is one of the unexpected benefits of cohousing.
What Are Your Hesitations?
If any of these questions sound familiar, you’re not alone — and you don’t have to figure things out on your own. One of the easiest ways to explore cohousing is by attending a free event, meeting members, and asking real questions. If this made you curious to hear more, sign up for one of our info sessions or drop by our weekly Coffee and Cohousing meetups! - whatever your hesitations, we can offer support and perspective.
(Image generated by Gemeni AI)